Saying “Sorry” Is Not Enough
Alone, sorry is an empty word.
It means to communicate feelings of guilt and regret. It means to soothe a hurting heart. It means to signal a commitment to improvement and better times.
Yet, because it is just a word, it rarely actually does.
Saying sorry is not the same as apologizing.
Sorry is used more as a means to an end than as an end in itself.
Many children are forcefully taught to say “Sorry” to a person they have wronged. But while you can force someone to say they’re sorry, you can’t force them to actually feel sorry. Thus, most people learn to use the word to adhere to social norms, rather than to genuinely learn from their mistakes and mature.
As a result of this, sorry has become a selfish act.
People say “Sorry” when they want the easy way out. They say “Sorry” to escape accountability and end the conversation before it gets too personal. They say “Sorry” because they don’t have the courage to say or do more.
People say “Sorry” not because they mean it, but because they have learned that it is their way out of trouble — and the key to other people’s forgiveness.
Apologies are more than just words.
Behind any real apology is a promise to change.
You have to genuinely mean that you are sorry. You have to recognize and expose your faults. You have to consider the other person’s pain and broken trust, and you have to make an effort to learn and grow in order to heal it.
Essentially, you have to give a real apology:
- Step 1: Acknowledge your mistake, and take accountability
- Step 2: Tell the other person exactly what you are sorry for doing
- Step 3: Make a promise not to repeat this mistake, and commit to it
Giving an apology is hard.
It requires you to be humble. It requires you to place someone else’s needs and desires in front of your own. It requires you to change.
And it is hard, being the bigger person.
But “Sorry” is not a real apology. It is just a word. And it is nothing without action; nothing without the empathy, accountability, and responsibility that it means to communicate.
In truth, “Sorry” is nothing but an empty promise.
Because unless you actually learn and change, you can’t claim that you are truly sorry.
